HONESTY MAKES US VULNERABLE. LET US BE HONEST ANYWAY

 

A fellow went into a fried chicken restaurant to get some chicken for himself and his female companion. She waited in the car while he went in to pick up the chicken. Instead of handing the box of chicken, the store manager gave the guy the box where he had placed for camouflage the day’s earnings for deposit.

The fellow took the box, went back to the car, and drove away. When they got to the park and opened the box, they discovered they had a box full of money. Now that was a very vulnerable moment for anyone. But, finding the mistake, he got back in his car and went back to the place and returned the money to the manager. The manager was elated. He told the fellow:

“Stick around, I want to call the newspaper and have your picture taken. You’re the most honest guy in town”

“Oh, no, don’t do that!”

“Why not?”

“Well, you see, I’m married, and the woman I’m with is not my wife.”

The anecdote above was taken from the book “Charles Swindoll’s Favorite Stories and Illustrations.” Skin-deep, I picked out this story because it’s not only amusing but also real. It could happen to anyone. In-depth, I picked it out because it illustrates the paradox of good and bad inherent in human nature.

Dr. M. Scott Peck in his book “Road Less Traveled and Beyond” wrote:

“Whenever someone is bold enough to ask me, ‘Dr. Peck, what is human nature?’ my first answer is likely to be ‘Human nature is to go to the bathroom in your pants.’”

Tongue-in-cheek as it may seem, his description tells of “the way each of us started: doing what came naturally, letting go whenever we felt like it.” Of course, he referred to our childhood. Out of curiosity, I asked my wife about her dealings on this “human nature” with our kids.

WIFE

Our daughter Dionne, just like any child, let it go anytime, anyplace, and anywhere. As one popular sports shoe advertised years ago, “It’s everywhere.” When she’s one-year-old, I bought a potty trainer and put it in one corner. Every time I sense she’s going to pee or poo, I let her sit on her plastic potty trainer. Sometimes she peed or pooed; oftentimes, she didn’t.

As a working mom, when at home, I was bodily attached to her almost all the time. Going to the toilet myself, I would sit her on my lap, projecting a funny picture of both of us sitting on the toilet bowl. It took a lot of patience. In the middle of the night when I needed to use the toilet, I took her with me and let her sit on the bowl, and made a swooshing sound with my mouth. Most of the time, it worked.

When she’s three, our bedroom was set free from wet blankets. One day, we’re delighted to see she had gone to the toilet to poo after which I cleaned her with soap and water. Soon after, her bulky diaper, she didn’t like to wear anymore; and she started to like wearing a panty.

One time, we’re having a Christmas party in our office when, out of the blue, right after dinner, she told me she wanted to go to the toilet. I was worried a bit -- first time to come up outside our home. I heaved a sigh of relief when she carried it through. After she pooed, I wiped her with bathroom tissue paper. All of a sudden, she said to me, “It’s still dirty, Mom, I want soap and water.” Then and there, I knew my daughter Dionne had outgrown her natal stage of the “human nature.”

At this point, one may ask, what am I driving at? “Inday Sara” Duterte-Carpio appears to be running for presidency or vice-presidency in the coming election. In my previous article, I propounded the need for a role model leader to lead us to where we must go. A leader whose quality is defined by the set of principles and values he or she believes. I take issue with what “Inday Sara” said about Honesty:

“I tell them all, that there is no single candidate who does not lie, so honesty should not be an issue now.”

The backlash of such statement in defending Imee Marcos and Bong Go pressed her down in justifying her statement by rubbing salt to the wound, and further said:

“[W]hat the law requires for a senator, ‘able to read and write, natural-born citizen.’ Does it say the person should have good moral character? Does it say that the person has to be honest?”

Vera Files fact-checked and asserted primarily Republic Act 6713, specifically Section 4 as excerpted below:

“[Public officials] shall at all times respect the rights of others, and shall refrain from doing acts contrary to laws, GOOD MORALS (underscoring mine), good customs, public policy, public order, public safety, and public interest.”

Let’s go much deeper by looking again into what Inday Sara said: “I tell them all, that there is no single candidate who does not lie, so honesty should not be an issue now.”

“I tell them all that there is no single candidate who does not lie.” Correct. We are all born liars – that’s human nature.

“So, honesty should not be an issue now.” Wrong. We can alter our human nature – if we choose to do so – to be honest, to do good. The fellow who returned the chicken box full of money chose to be honest despite being unfaithful to his wife. My daughter Dionne who let it go properly in the toilet chose to change – to do good -- because her Mom whom she loves said so.

Let’s go radical by dwelling on Mother Teresa’s words:

“If you do good, people will accuse you of ulterior motives. Do good anyway.

Honesty makes you vulnerable. Be honest anyway.

Give the world the best you have and you’ll get kicked in the teeth. Give the world the best you’ve got anyway.”

Finally, let’s go spiritual by thinking about a leader with core values based on the Bible.

A leader with strong values built his/her house on the rock. The rain came down, the streams rose, and the winds blew and beat against that house, yet it did not fall, because it had its foundation on the rock. A leader with weak values built his/her house on sand. The rain came down, the stream rose, and the winds blew and beat against that house, and it fell with a great crash.

Spiritually speaking, Inday Sara, with her myopic view on honesty, has built her house on sand.