(The following scripted episode is an original creation inspired by the television show “The Simpsons.” This content is a fictional parody and is not affiliated with or endorsed by the creators, producers, or distributors of “The Simpsons.”)
Scene: Exterior of Springfield’s newest establishment, “Simpson’s Savings Bank.” There’s a modest crowd gathered for the grand opening. A stage is set with a podium. Homer, Marge, Bart, Lisa, and Maggie are on stage, with a banner above reading, “Grand Opening!”
Homer: (grabs the mic) Welcome, everyone, to Simpson Savings Bank! Your money is safer with us than a donut in my hands! (chuckles)
Marge: (smiling nervously) We are here to serve you and your financial needs with the utmost respect and…integrity.
Lisa: (in a whisper) Um, Mom, are you sure Bart should be part of this?
Bart: (grinning) Relax, Lis. I’ve got this.
Lisa: That’s what worries me.
Homer: Springfieldians, we know money stuff can be boring. But not with us! We’ve got a special announcement for all you potential depositors out there. Drum roll, please!
Lisa: (rolling her eyes) This is going to be good…
Homer: We are open for business!
Ned Flanders: (raising his hand) Uh, I’m a bit concerned about the, er, transparency and ethics of your operations!
Marge: (stepping in) Oh, Ned, don’t worry! We’re just having a bit of fun. We take your money very seriously.
Audience Member: (calling out) But isn’t Bart known for his, um, questionable activities?
Homer: Folks, let me put your worries to rest. Sure, Bart pulled a prank or two in his day, but when it comes to your money, I promise to keep our hands clean.
Audience Member: But you did nothing to deal with Bart’s wrongdoing?
Homer: Okay, let me put it this way: We are open for business, but if you think we’re doing something wrong and will judge us, leave us alone.
Crowd: (murmurs of confusion and laughter)
Mayor Quimby: (scratching his head) Well, as the mayor, I must say – this is the most intriguing bank launch I’ve ever attended!
Homer: (grinning) That’s the spirit, Mayor! And remember, our vaults are as secure as Mom’s secret ingredient in her meatloaf. So come on in, everyone! Have some snacks, open an account, and we’ll make some money together -- Simpson style!
Maggie: (sucking on her pacifier, a speech bubble appears) “Welcome to the Simpson Savings Bank!”
Narrator: (voice-over) And so, Springfield gains a new financial institution, run by the most unpredictable family in town. Will their savings soar, or will it be another classic Simpson’s catastrophe? Stay tuned!
End Scene.
Simpson’s new financial institution faces a dilemma mirroring the one confronting the Philippines today, stemming from two crucial factors: Maharlika Investment Fund (MIF) and the International Criminal Court (ICC). I wrote about this in my July 22, 2023, ATABAY article MIF & ICC: How Two Notices Reveal the Contradictions of President Bongbong Marcos (PBBM) Economic Vision.
“Open for business”
“Leave us alone”
What impression do you get when you see these two notices on the front door? Confused?
The first notice “Open for business” signals the intention behind the following headlines:
“Marcos signs Maharlika Investment Fund bill into Law” – Philstar
“Marcos backs Maharlika fund: ‘We need added investment’” – Inquirer
The second notice “Leave us alone” reflects the defiance of the following headline:
“Marcos: PH ending all involvement with ICC” – CNN Philippines
Due to the glaring contradiction, we must ask the same question as in Simpson’s case: Will the MIF investment soar, or will it be a classic catastrophe?
Let’s be fair, PBBM tried to make the MIF soar. Let’s recall PBBM’s words:
“Magpapakilala muna tayo. Kapag hindi tayo bumiyahe at nagpakita sa mga conference na yan, hindi nila tayo iniisip. Wala sa isipan nila ang Pilipinas. Kailangan natin ipakita kung ano ang atin para mapaganda ang POTENTIAL INVESTMENTS nila na dadalhin dito sa Pilipinas.” (Underscoring mine)
Rigoberto Tiglao spotted the handwriting on the wall in his December 18, 2024 column Foreign Investment Drastically Falling…:
“FDI into the Philippines has been halved in the second year of the Marcos, Jr. administration. Add to that the reduction in Philippine exports by $2 billion in the same period, and the Philippines faces a foreign exchange crisis on the horizon.
"Obviously, Marcos’s 10 visits to capital-rich nations – after each he announced billions of dollars in investment pledges – have been fictions of his mind.”
ABS-CBN bared on August 14, 2024, Maharlika Fund ‘Still Scouting’ For Investment Opportunities: DOF. It reported the Department of Finance’s stance, revealing that the Maharlika Investment Fund (MIF) has yet to make any investment nearly a year after it was set up. Finance Secretary Ralph Recto said the MIF firm is still setting up shop.
No doubt, that’s a head-scratcher. We don’t need rocket science to connect the dots. Like in the Simpson’s crowd, the world market has taken the contradictory signs with “murmurs of confusion,” hopefully not “laughter” by such a striking contradiction on the PH door:
On MIF: “We are open for business”
On ICC: “Leave us alone”
Rightly and not surprisingly, the following latest developments have grabbed the headlines:
“Philippines to ‘respond favorably’ if ICC seeks Interpol” – Reuters
“Philippines to cooperate if ICC issues warrant” – Rappler
“PH may hand over ICC suspects to Interpol” – Inquirer
For sure, the Philippines has decidedly figured out its contradiction. Inevitably, the House quad committee recommended that former President Duterte, along with his close confidants and Senators Ronald “Bato” de la Rosa and Christopher “Bong” Go, be charged with crimes against humanity.
This latest turn of events paints a picture of a promising “step in the right direction towards achieving justice for the thousands of victims of extrajudicial killings” under the Duterte administration.
In retrospect, I recounted in my January 27, 2024, ATABAY article ICC Cryptic Message: The Stone Will Cry Out the following excerpts of Bato's dramatic disclosure in an interview:
“I am afraid of going to jail. Takot ako na makulong dahil kawawa ang mga apo ko at hindi ko na makita.”
I’ve conjured up an image of Bato watching his immovable wall slowly collapse, piece by piece. We recall that Duterte erected such a preemptive wall during his reign. No less than the New York Times bannered in 2019 Duterte’s self-protected act: Philippine Officially Leaves the International Criminal Court.
In my ATABAY article, I shared an uncanny optical illusion image that plays tricks on readers’ vision. For an intuitive mind, one could make out the following cryptic message: The stones will cry out. Strangely enough, it was taken from Jesus’ words in Luke 19:40 of the Bible: “I tell you, if they were to keep silent, the stones would cry out.” All at once, we could, without question, figure out “they” for the drug war victims.
I concluded my article with the following reassuring statement:
“If Senator Bato truly loves his apos, he must tell the truth, the whole truth, and nothing but the truth. Then he will know the Truth, and the Truth will set him free. (John 8:32)”
Be not afraid. (Luke 2:10)
Content and editing put together in collaboration with Microsoft Bing AI-powered Co-Pilot
Head collage photos courtesy of Shutterstock, iStock, MIF, and Canva
MIF & ICC collage photos courtesy of Graphix Place, Signs & Lines, Sound Cloud, Shutterstock, Business Mirror, and Vector Stock
Other still photos courtesy of iStock, Pngtree, Vecteezy, & Facebook
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